You Know You’re Old When……

The fashions that were trendy when you were a teenager and that you remember begging your mum to buy because “all of my friends have one” are back to being trendy. The first few crept up on me: the head bands, leggings with the big tops; then came the miniskirts followed by all the colors of the rainbow jeans (yellow jeans anyone?)

And then today I got an email from DSW telling me that Jellies (remember those? They were the ugly, colored rubber shoes) were coming back and I freaked out. I mean, I remember wearing my mom’s old clogs during the clogs phase while I was in High school, but that was my mom, it was okay…she was old! It was just fine that her former trends were being recycled.

Don’t think my mom found it very amusing but it is soooo gratifying to watch the antics of the lunatic yet, harrowing to have him as a son.

I think I just adopted the lunatic!!!

Oh to be Free!

My church is currently going through a 6-week series entitled Free. Even before turning to the first page of the orange book that would serve as the weekly guide for the series; I felt a strange sense of trepidation that I could not shake off. See, to me, a series titled Free screamed “let go” and “be open” which would mean shoving all my inhibitions and hang-ups aside and allowing people to know the real me -so yeah, fear and trepidation sounds about right.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying to be Free, you need to be completely open and transparent to everyone that you meet but not being able to let loved ones in to know the real you is like living with shackles that just wouldn’t let you go farther than a certain perimeter, trust me I know, I’m living proof. So far, the journey has been tough and painful, it’s made me realize how “unfree” I am and wishing I could break through the shackles and run…Free.

The most important thing I’ve learned in these past three weeks though is that what keeps me shackled is the lies; the ones I tell myself, the ones I let people tell me etc. Lies such as “God loves other people more than me”, “God is disappointed in me”, “I need to clean up my act before God will love me”, sound familiar? Well, the bible verse “…..the truth will set you free” has never rang so true. These Lies, though not big and glaring have been digging roots and spreading branches in my heart for years now and I have been letting them. It’s crazy, I didn’t even know the lies I believed until they were presented before me and I had to say, “Yeah, that’s me”.

It’s going to be a long and painful journey but one that I’m willing to go on while praying and hoping that I find myself victorious on the other side screaming “Free at last, free at last, thank God almighty I'm free at last” (sorry, just had to sneak that one in there). Seriously though, join me on this journey if you need to be free.

PS: Can you guess how many times I used the word Free?

Buzz...Schmuzz

This week, I watched my friends who had innocently signed up for the Google email service known as gmail struggle with "Buzz"...Google's new alternative to Twitter. With no prior notification, I noticed when I logged into my email account that I had been automatically signed up for this service. Okay, no problem at least I didn't have to come up with another user name and password or login to a different site which by the way is my main issue with joining twitter but I digress. I thought nothing of it when I found out I already had 4 followers and was following 10 people; they were people I knew (my email contacts), no big deal.

However, as I read friends' buzzes (i'm guessing that's what it will be called) I came to realize that Google had crossed the line. It seemed like almost everything you did was buzzed to all your followers -posted pictures, blog posts etc. Google had somehow decided that all your followers were entitled to know what you were up to -forget the fact that you were automatically designated followers (and rejecting them seemed oh! so rude). A friend posted some pictures in her supposedly private online album and Google buzzed the link to the album to all her followers; another friend thought she was just chatting with one person but was actually buzzing to the entire world, apparently there is a setting to chat with just one contact but of course this was not the default. As another friend put it, "I was going to send an email to someone but I got so scared, I decided to pick up the phone".

Oh internet!, you have brought so much good to us -instant connections, long lost friends, marriages ;-) but when did privacy become so elusive that we have to fight for it, why should the default setting be "yes, please broadcast every single thing I do to the entire world". I find this amusing because I figured out the issue pretty quickly and rectified it immediately, but it will only go downhill from here, as much as I love social networking, I still love my privacy and think (hope) it is my right to decide who I want to know my business and not be defaulted into it. So dear people of earth, next time you log into your email, or any site, be careful....you may be broadcasting (or buzzing) to the entire world.

Here's hoping I am.

Letting go....

My knuckles turn pale as I grip the arm rest a little too tightly
I try to relax but I can’t
I stare at the lady in the blue dress as she pulls the mask over her face
And explains how Oxygen will flow
“In the event of an emergency” she says
All I can hear is my thumping heart as fear and trepidation set in
Because, yes, I’m about to fly again.

I take a deep breath and a still small voice whispers “let go”
“I wish I could”, I whispered in return
My heart keeps beating at the crazy rapid speed
That’s now the norm every time I see those wings
“Let go”, I hear again
“Oh, that’s easy for you to say”, I almost yell back
Fear gets me really mad too.

The taxiing begins, the “calm before the storm” I call it
I take a look around, everyone else looks so calm
I close my eyes but all I can see is an aircraft nose-diving into the earth
“Aargh!!” I yell on the inside as my eyes pop back open
“Let go” the voice is a little louder this time
Oh Lord, I really do want to
I keep praying and then I realize –my knuckles are rested in my lap because I’ve Let go!

We’re flying now.

Yéle – A Cry for Freedom

The term “Yéle” was coined in a song by Wyclef Jean, a native of Haiti and a successful Grammy award winning singer/producer; it is also the name of his grassroots movement to rebuild Haiti. However, the cry has never sounded as loud and as desperate as the last few days in the aftermath of the massive 7.0 magnitude earthquake that hit this already oppressed country.

Read Wyclef’s statement as he describes Haiti:
“Haiti is my native country, one I know as the first black nation to gain independence in 1804. Most other people seem to know Haiti only by the statistics about how bad things are there. The majority of its 8 million residents live on less than $1 per day. Unemployment is close to 80 percent, and more than half the population is under 21 years old. Haiti is the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere.”

Reading this before the earthquake would have broken my heart but in the aftermath of the devastation it is twice so. I am not here to preach, I am just here to ask you to reconsider.
If so far you have ignored the coverage and been disenchanted, reconsider. If you have dismissed it as just “another” disaster, reconsider. If you are saying, “what about when Hurricane Katrina happened why didn’t people help then like they want us to do now”, reconsider. The fact is we don’t know why this happened and I doubt we will get that answer but for now, let us do what is good -not what we think is right but what is good! God bless you.

Here are some ways you can help:

If you live in Cincinnati, The National Underground Railroad Freedom Center will be collecting clothing and personal care items for the children of Haiti on Martin Luther King, Jr. Day (Monday January 18th from 11 a.m - 5 p.m). Any items of children’s clothing (newborns to teenagers), toothpaste, a pillow or blanket –think anything that a homeless and perhaps orphaned child on the street in Port-au-Prince could use. See http://www.freedomcenter.org/ for more information. And as always, admission to the freedom center is free on MLK day.

If you live elsewhere in the United States, here are a few suggestions:
Text 'YELE' to 501501 and $5 is automatically added to your phone bill and donated to Wyclef's Yéle organization.
OR/And Text Haiti to 90999 and $10 will be added to your phone bill to be donated to the Red Cross.

You can also check out www.CNN.com/Impact for more ways to help/donate.

Finally, spread the word!

Shopping chronicles

So, the other day I was in my favorite store looking for the perfect pair of leggings (I know, so 1992 but they are a perfect alternative to jeans all the time) when I came across another type of pants that I had never seen before. On closer inspection of the label, I discovered they were called Harem pants, I was intrigued! I wasn't in the mood to try clothes on in a fitting room so I bought a pair that looked like they would fit and waited till I got home to try them.

Now, if you know what I am talking about, you probably know where this story is going but if you're as clueless as I was, please keep reading. I stood in my bedroom staring at my image in the mirror wondering why I looked like I had a diaper on and had taken a very large dump in said diapers. I knew I had the pants on the right way, so I tried tugging and pulling in an effort to make them look like something I could actually walk out into the world in but to no avail. Surely, I must have the wrong size I whispered to mirror image.

Like I said I was intrigued, so I went back to favorite store and tried on a size up and a size down but still I got poopy diaper. Next stop, the internet of course. I refused to believe that women (the sane ones at least) were walking around wearing poopy-diaper looking pants so I needed to know what they were supposed to look like. So here's the deal (I have been so out of the loop); These pants have been rearing their heads since the spring of 2009 but thankfully I am not the only one that thinks they look ridiculous, in fact there is a whole debate going on about outlawing them (yeah right, if Ugg boots can live to see a new decade everything else can and will thrive, I apologize if you own Uggs).

A picture search however, produced some very insightful results; for one, I saw some even uglier versions of these "Hammer" pants...cropped, jersey, neon-colored, just name it. More importantly though, I found a picture of what they are supposed to look like (see above) and now I am on a hunt for them (well, not technically but I'll be looking).

So what do you think, Harem pants...do or don't?

Don't call it a resolution!

Okay, so this is the third blog i've started; "started" being the operative word. The last one was created in October 2008 and has a grand total of two posts to date. Well, I don't resolve to do better because if you're like me, the idea of resolutions is just a recipe for failure because it usually goes like this: “Try hard. Fail. Try harder. Fail again. Try even harder. Give up!”.

I read something yesterday that really spoke to me as a follower of Christ, it's not about trying but about accepting God's grace even in the midst of your failures and knowing it's only by His power that you can do better. So, no I don't resolve to do better but by His Grace, I trust I will.

If you haven't figured it out yet, I'm a Christian, I understand that this could mean anything to you depending on what you've known or who you know so let me explain: I try to live out my life following God's will. I truly believe that God made me for a specific purpose (trust me it took a while to get that into my thick head) but the really hard part is figuring out what that purpose is; so welcome to that journey.

My hope is to live One life that pleases God so while sometimes I may express what I'm learning and experiencing through my relationship with Him, I will also talk about my other relationships with friends, family, my hobbies and fun things that I spend my time doing.

And just incase you're wondering, 'Nati stands for Cincinnati, Ohio which is where I currently reside. I think it's a beautiful city and just right for me in many ways although it may be a tad too cold sometimes but like I said I was created for a purpose and 'Nati seems to fit in there somehow so I'm loving it......welcome to my world!